[Cable & Deadpool] Marital Commitments
May. 31st, 2012 12:21 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rallamajoopCross-posting another ficlet from the kink meme. This idea for this fill has been rattling around my head since the prompt (Nate proposes to Wade) first appeared back in December, so minuscule word count notwithstanding, finally getting this thing down has been quite ridiculously satisfying. (Let's all not talk about the fact that by my recent standards that probably qualifies as lightning turnaround time.)
Title: Marital Commitments
Summary: Nate pops the question. Wade pops a vein. Fortunately, Nate is nothing if not qualified to be convincing.
Word Count: 820
Rating: PG-ish
The Dominus Objective makes keeping up with international current events easier than even Omega level telepathy ever could, but after skimming over three different reports on the nuclear situation in Korea and one on some very suspicious activity on the Latverian border without finding anything to catch his interest, Cable has to admit his heart's not in it today, and that's – odd, to say the least. On the opposite side of the open-plan lounge, Betty White is sharing an anecdote about her fictional brother's bird impression. There is absolutely no logical reason why this should be distracting to a man who once filtered out the anxieties, pain and joy of a whole world without compromising his concentration, and besides, he's been around Wade long enough that he's already seen this episode at least once. A casual browse through the output of a few thousand news feeds in a dozen languages looking for the scattered threads of commonality no-one else has noticed yet is, as far as Cable is concerned, the ideal way to relax after a long day's work, yet here he is, quite unable to focus because Wade is on the other side of the room, watching repeats of a show he must know by heart by now and leaving sodden tissues all over Cable's couch every time the late Bea Arthur makes a passing reference to her age and/or mortality. When exactly had that happened?
He flicks the Dominus Objective feed off with a thought, and there's nothing left to obscure his view of the back of Wade's head poking over the couch, or the slightly squelchy honking noise Wade makes blowing his nose. On a whim, he finds himself calling, “Wade. Have you ever thought about making this official?”
“The rule where you don't speak until you hear the sultry tones of Cynthia Fee coming from my corner?” says Wade, eyes glued to the screen.
The station cuts to a commercial break. “I mean,” says Cable, “you and me,” then he blinks, and completely misses the moment where Wade's head whips around.
“Excuse me?” says Wade. “Did that new McDonalds jingle just take a really weird twist, or did I hear you-”
“Propose? Yes. More or less.”
“Us? Me and you?” The couch topples backwards and lands inverted with Wade at an angle that cannot be comfortable. He doesn’t miss a beat. “What an idea, then we can get us a white picket fence and a Pekinese and adopt a whole family of adorable African orphans – oh wait you already did that with a fence you call ‘Providence’. Is your way of telling me I’ve gone and got you ‘in a family way’? C’mon babe, this is the 21st century! You can pop out to see the man with the coathanger in your lunch hour and be back for fifth period before anyone knows you’re gone! No-one has to marry anyone anymore! And what possessed you to pop the question when the cameras aren’t even rolling? Don’t you come running to me when ratings tank in the middle of the second season of Keeping up with the Messiahs and we’ve got nothing left for the movie-length special! Do you ever think this shit through before you open your big mouth?”
“In detail,” says Cable. “Let me explain.”
Wade folds himself up with his legs crossed against the now-vertical couch cushions. “Oh, this is gonna be good.”
“First – next time I miss a UN meeting because you stumbled back from an AIM facility with a mouthful of floral aphrodisiac, I'll be able to blame my absence on 'marital commitments'.”
“Like that's ever gonna happen again. Who hasn't been through that once or twice...”
“Three times.”
“...once or twice and it could happen to anyone, sheesh, you don’t think I do it on purpose do you?”
“Secondly,” says Cable, firmly, “no-one will ever again be able to write off my relationship with you as 'a brain-addled fling with his pet psychopath'.”
“Who said that!?”
“Later,” Cable promises. “And finally – we'll both get to see my father's face at the wedding.”
Cable knows he's scored a hit with that last one when Wade is, for one of few times in their whole association, stunned speechless for nearly a whole ten seconds. “Did you...” he gasps, “did you just ask me to marry you to mess with your dad?”
“I should have put that one first, shouldn't I?”
“Nate,” Wade is thrumming with so much energy that the couch back is actually rattling against the tiles. “Take. Me. Now.”
Cable glances reluctantly up at the TV screen over Wade's left shoulder. “The commercial break is over.”
“Do I look like I care? You. Me. The kitchen table. Now!”
Later on, Cable realises that in all the excitement Wade never had actually said ‘yes’, but then, when all was said and done, it was hardly as though he'd needed to.
Title: Marital Commitments
Summary: Nate pops the question. Wade pops a vein. Fortunately, Nate is nothing if not qualified to be convincing.
Word Count: 820
Rating: PG-ish
The Dominus Objective makes keeping up with international current events easier than even Omega level telepathy ever could, but after skimming over three different reports on the nuclear situation in Korea and one on some very suspicious activity on the Latverian border without finding anything to catch his interest, Cable has to admit his heart's not in it today, and that's – odd, to say the least. On the opposite side of the open-plan lounge, Betty White is sharing an anecdote about her fictional brother's bird impression. There is absolutely no logical reason why this should be distracting to a man who once filtered out the anxieties, pain and joy of a whole world without compromising his concentration, and besides, he's been around Wade long enough that he's already seen this episode at least once. A casual browse through the output of a few thousand news feeds in a dozen languages looking for the scattered threads of commonality no-one else has noticed yet is, as far as Cable is concerned, the ideal way to relax after a long day's work, yet here he is, quite unable to focus because Wade is on the other side of the room, watching repeats of a show he must know by heart by now and leaving sodden tissues all over Cable's couch every time the late Bea Arthur makes a passing reference to her age and/or mortality. When exactly had that happened?
He flicks the Dominus Objective feed off with a thought, and there's nothing left to obscure his view of the back of Wade's head poking over the couch, or the slightly squelchy honking noise Wade makes blowing his nose. On a whim, he finds himself calling, “Wade. Have you ever thought about making this official?”
“The rule where you don't speak until you hear the sultry tones of Cynthia Fee coming from my corner?” says Wade, eyes glued to the screen.
The station cuts to a commercial break. “I mean,” says Cable, “you and me,” then he blinks, and completely misses the moment where Wade's head whips around.
“Excuse me?” says Wade. “Did that new McDonalds jingle just take a really weird twist, or did I hear you-”
“Propose? Yes. More or less.”
“Us? Me and you?” The couch topples backwards and lands inverted with Wade at an angle that cannot be comfortable. He doesn’t miss a beat. “What an idea, then we can get us a white picket fence and a Pekinese and adopt a whole family of adorable African orphans – oh wait you already did that with a fence you call ‘Providence’. Is your way of telling me I’ve gone and got you ‘in a family way’? C’mon babe, this is the 21st century! You can pop out to see the man with the coathanger in your lunch hour and be back for fifth period before anyone knows you’re gone! No-one has to marry anyone anymore! And what possessed you to pop the question when the cameras aren’t even rolling? Don’t you come running to me when ratings tank in the middle of the second season of Keeping up with the Messiahs and we’ve got nothing left for the movie-length special! Do you ever think this shit through before you open your big mouth?”
“In detail,” says Cable. “Let me explain.”
Wade folds himself up with his legs crossed against the now-vertical couch cushions. “Oh, this is gonna be good.”
“First – next time I miss a UN meeting because you stumbled back from an AIM facility with a mouthful of floral aphrodisiac, I'll be able to blame my absence on 'marital commitments'.”
“Like that's ever gonna happen again. Who hasn't been through that once or twice...”
“Three times.”
“...once or twice and it could happen to anyone, sheesh, you don’t think I do it on purpose do you?”
“Secondly,” says Cable, firmly, “no-one will ever again be able to write off my relationship with you as 'a brain-addled fling with his pet psychopath'.”
“Who said that!?”
“Later,” Cable promises. “And finally – we'll both get to see my father's face at the wedding.”
Cable knows he's scored a hit with that last one when Wade is, for one of few times in their whole association, stunned speechless for nearly a whole ten seconds. “Did you...” he gasps, “did you just ask me to marry you to mess with your dad?”
“I should have put that one first, shouldn't I?”
“Nate,” Wade is thrumming with so much energy that the couch back is actually rattling against the tiles. “Take. Me. Now.”
Cable glances reluctantly up at the TV screen over Wade's left shoulder. “The commercial break is over.”
“Do I look like I care? You. Me. The kitchen table. Now!”
Later on, Cable realises that in all the excitement Wade never had actually said ‘yes’, but then, when all was said and done, it was hardly as though he'd needed to.
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no subject
Date: 2012-05-30 06:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 03:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-30 07:09 pm (UTC)Great stuff. Egads, I am always so delighted to see new works for these two. Thank you. :D
no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 04:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-30 10:29 pm (UTC)“I should have put that one first, shouldn't I?”
Oh, perfect! XD
no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 04:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 08:02 am (UTC)This was absolutely delightful. And so, so perfect that Wade was all "TAKE ME NOW" at the idea that Nate was proposing to mess with Scott's head, WHAT EVEN IS THAT NATE, I LOVE YOU.
And you. For this. This was fabulous. Thanks for the fun read!
no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 08:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 10:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-31 01:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-01 06:42 am (UTC)xD PFFFT - Bahahahaha
I'd watch that
no subject
Date: 2012-06-01 06:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-01 02:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-02 09:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-04 07:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-21 01:12 am (UTC)And now that the messy gushing parts are out of the way, I wanted to elaborate by saying that I'm a recent convert to the wackiness that is Marvel. Maybe it's all the movies, or maybe it's all the great comics, but I started off as a kid in love with the X-Men, but like most things when you're a kid, was really too young to appreciate it. Flash forward a couple dozen years, and I desperately wanted to get back into the Marvel thing, but I had absolutely no idea where to start. The universe was just so convoluted and confusing, full of reboots and false starts and characters who seemed to have changed so much from what I remember. And that was the just thing thing, I didn't *want* to get into the universe, I only wanted to find a character I enjoyed and get into their comics. Simple right? Haha, wrong, as the half-dozen comics I bought only to give away proved.
A friend finally recommended that I start reading Deadpool, specifically Deadpool & Cable, Deadpool Classic, and gems like Suicide Kings and Wade Wilson's War. I've pretty much loved DP's wackiness from the beginning, and after the epic (bro?)romance that was Cable&Deadpool, I can't begin to express how wonderful it is to find someone who gets them just...right.
I won't go into how you manage to capture Wade's voice perfectly, every time, the sweet and sour mix of snarkiness and insecurity. I won't tell you how you manage to flesh out Nathan so that he's not just a cardboard cut-out 'tough-guy soldier', but interesting and likable (considering I bought C&DP ONLY for Wade, I was completely taken aback by how much I grew to love Cable).
I won't get into how well you present their odd-couple relationship, and how every story you've written featuring them is just so very engaging and convincing. I'm sure you've heard it all before, and better expressed than anything I could possibly come up with.
What I will say is that you're amazing, and I just wanted you to know. :)
no subject
Date: 2012-06-30 03:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-30 02:11 am (UTC)Siberia-winter-calm austere scary humanitarian troll. xD
no subject
Date: 2012-06-30 03:24 am (UTC)