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rallamajoopAnd now I've actually used the title and all, so it's official. Not that I can't still change my mind between here and the finished copy if need be. >.>
Other parts so far:
The ficlets that started it all
Plot notes and background info
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
The tunnel lead out on to what seemed like a low rooftop, although the surface was mostly flat. Taller buildings soared up from the unseen ground below on either side. Ahead, a pale white shape stood out in sharp contrast to the dull grey of their surroundings. It was another rooftop, a little lower down and half buried where larger buildings had begun to collapse on either side. The white roof itself, however, had miraculously survived. It was obvious all of a sudden that this was where they’d been going all along.
Watanuki pointed. “There’s a way down on the other side. There should be some kind of entrance from there.”
Doumeki squinted to where Watanuki was pointing, he thought he could just about make out the place he was talking about. “That our destination?”
“Seems like it,” said Watanuki evasively. Apparently his ghost was being vague again,
Rubble around the base had built up so high that the entrance brought them in through a broken second story window. Doumeki’s feet touched down on a floor covered with a couple of decades of dust. Once his eyes had had a moment to adjust to the dimmer light, Doumeki saw that they’d arrived in a small, square room. There was a bed on one wall – a real one with a proper base and springs, but the room as a whole had an artificial quality to it somehow. Doumeki doubted anyone had ever lived here long.
“Here?” he inquired.
Watanuki shook his head. “There’s nothing in this room that would be useful. We have to go further down.”
The corridor was far darker than the room had been. Doorways lead to other rooms on both sides, but there were no windows to let light in from less than the width of a room away. The end of the corridor brought them to a corner, then another door, and through it, down a flight of stairs. Whatever they were looking for was on the bottom floor.
The ground floor was better lit than Doumeki had expected. Open spaces were larger on this level, and most of the large windows lining the outer wall were clear of the debris that had covered the other side of the building. One final journey down a darkened corridor brought them to where light spilled out of an open doorway. The room beyond –the first of a series of smaller rooms – was lit from another window, one of few in which even the glass had survived intact. Inside, row after row of shelves held an assortment of boxes and jars. They must have found their way to a store room.
“This is it,” said Watanuki, stopping and turning back to face his follower.
Doumeki picked a jar off a nearby shelf and inspected it. Most of the words on the faded label were gibberish to him, but a couple of familiar ones rang some illuminating bells. “These are medical supplies.”
“That’s what this whole building was for,” said Watanuki. “…some kind of medical stuff.”
Definitely a find, assuming any of these old drugs were still usable after all this time, or anyone remembered what they were for. But even if less than a quarter of all this was salvageable, it was still a treasure trove. With their usual diet of old meat, even a handful of vitamin pills was worth a good deal.
But just stuffing things into a bag at random couldn’t be much of a strategy. “There aren’t many things here I recognise,” Doumeki admitted.
“I can point out what’s usable,” said Watanuki.
Doumeki nodded, and shrugged the pack off his shoulders. “Your ghost was some kind of doctor?” he asked conversationally.
“No,” Watanuki replied distantly, “he just had some sort of part-time job here once.” He shook himself slightly. “I don’t ask them how they know this stuff – they just do. Start with these ones here,” he added, pointing to a shelf.
After moving through the shelves and piling a few dozen containers carefully into the pack at Watanuki’s direction, Doumeki had to ask, “Will we be able to get back here a second time?” With the pack almost full they’d barely dented the supplies here.
Watanuki paused a moment, then sighed and said, “He’ll be smug and annoying about it, but he’ll lead us back here again. Just… we can’t always do this, alright? Some of them get all tetchy and they take it out on me.”
“Noted,” said Doumeki, not really listening. Satisfied, he buckled the pack back up for the long trip home.
The hour it took on the bike to get back to the camp gave Doumeki ample time to reflect on the outcome of the day. Watanuki’s talents had gone beyond question. It would take masterful ability to fabricate such a scheme deliberately – more than Doumeki could believe worth the effort to anyone. However, nothing he’d seen had to be supernatural, and it didn’t have to be conscious deceit either. A madman with a few unnaturally developed instincts for finding stable ground could pull of most of what he’d seen Watanuki do today without ever realising how he was doing it. Just because Watanuki honestly believed he was seeing ghosts didn’t mean they had to be real. And even if the ghosts really were real, it didn’t necessarily mean he wasn’t crazy.
After all, everyone was a little crazy these days.
***
“He’s for real,” was how he summarised it to Kurogane when they got back.
“Then it must be time we taught him how to avoid tripping the security fence,” said Kurogane, which was as close to throwing a welcoming party for the newcomer as the camp was ever likely to get.
The haul from their trip was delivered to Fye and Sakura, who fell on the task of sorting through it all eagerly. Watanuki made an attempt to help, but even he was a bit unclear about some of the jars he’d instructed Doumeki to take now that the serious question of what they were for had come up. Between them, enough of the containers were identified by the end of the day (painkillers, antibiotics, diet supplements, amongst many other kinds) for the trip to be declared a great success.
It was a great relief to Watanuki to have that first trip over with, although the outcome was no surprise. Even if they did have to go back again the very next day. Kurogane and Fye came too on the other bike that time, the latter making assorted comments about double dates and Kuro finally taking him out somewhere interesting, which Watanuki did his level best not to hear. Doumeki appeared to be doing likewise.
“At least your new keeper’s better looking than any of the last lot,” said the ghost.
“Shut up,” Watanuki hissed, and tried not to notice that Doumeki now seemed to be ignoring him the same way he was ignoring the other two.
***
When they got back from the second trip at last, Doumeki and Fye went to lug their new haul over to that lab building they still wouldn’t let him near. Apparently that wasn’t the only reason he’d been excluded from the final stage of the transport process though, because Kurogane pulled him aside almost as soon as they were back and said he needed a word.
Watanuki had not been left alone for long with anyone but Doumeki since he’d joined their camp, and Kurogane’s long limbed bulk and glare were no less imposing in private. He swallowed nervously and hoped he wasn’t being too obvious. He just couldn’t read anything from any of these people. Thank god Kurogane didn’t have any reason to be angry with him.
“’A couple of times a month’, you said,” Kurogane began, sitting himself down on the edge of a table.
“On average, Watanuki repeated automatically, wondering whether he should find somewhere to sit down himself or whether he’d been left standing deliberately. “But I meant it when I said I never know…”
“You never know when and you never know what for,” Kurogane cut in, demonstrating that his memory or comprehension skills left nothing lacking. “We can’t rely on that,” he said seriously, “but we can use it. You want to stay, you pull your weight around the camp like everyone else does. When you can find us supplies, we’ll take advantage of it, but you won’t be thrown out for failing as long as you work for your keep.”
Part of Watanuki was horribly insulted. It might have had a history of causing him as much strife as good, but he’d never had his unique supernatural gift reduced to a mild annoyance with the occasional boon before. It was also so painfully rational that it was just about impossible to object to.
“Doumeki already asked me what skills I had you could make use of. There isn’t much,” he admitted. “I’ve never been expected – or really allowed – to do much before.”
“You can learn,” said Kurogane, unperturbed. “Your past doesn’t matter to any of us here, it’s what you do from here on. It’s the same rule for everyone.”
“That’s the kind of rule you make when you have more to hide from your own past than everyone else does, isn’t it?” Watanuki had said before he could stop himself, then mentally kicked himself hard for it. You just didn’t say things like that to people like this. What was it about a week or two without getting beaten that had made him this stupid?
But Kurogane practically brushed his comment aside. “If that were true, would you want to know?”
“No,” Watanuki admitted. “But – that isn’t always how even you think, is it? I know you’re all still thinking about – about what happened to that gang you found me with.”
“Will it happen again?” Kurogane had him fixed with a look there could be no escaping from.
Not as long as you don’t beat me up and threaten to get my blood everywhere, was what Watanuki wanted to say, but could he really be sure that was the only possible trigger? “I don’t really know. Nothing like that has ever happened on that kind of scale before, but….”
“Then might be more than part of the past,” said Kurogane. “If it comes up in future, we’ll deal with it when we get there.”
With that, the conversation seemed to be over.
Barely a couple of weeks at this camp, and Watanuki still felt like his head had never stopped spinning since he arrived. There was something intrinsically real and solid about these people in a way that made everything he’d ever experienced seem like part of a dream in comparison, but that only made it all the harder to believe any of it would stay real at all.
“Oi,” said Kurogane, just as he was heading back to the building he and Doumeki shared. As soon as Watanuki looked back, Kurogane looked away again. “If you ever get a message from anyone called Souma, I don’t want to know.” That said, he pulled the door shut and left Watanuki gaping where he stood.
Watanuki decided then that he wasn’t going to ask anything more about those gravestones he’d seen in the least used corner of the camp. Whoever was there had left him alone so far, and now he certainly didn’t want to give them any excuse to do otherwise.
And that, six parts in and somewhere north of 13,000 words in, brings me to the end of what I have mentally labeled as 'Part 1' of the story of a whole. More specifically, based on the way I have the plan broken down by what major plot point goes where, that's part 1 of 4 (or possibly even 5, since part 4 may be trying to cover a bit much material) parts in total. The other parts of the story may or may not be of comparable length, though anyone who's ever seen any amateur writer try to predict just how long her story is going to be at completion before should know just how unreliable a guideline that's likely to be. Still, safe to say I have a *long* way left to go on this.
The good news is my buffer of material written-but-not-yet-posted is still looking reasonably healthy, because I'm through a lot of stuff from the start of Part 2 which I was a little lost in before. Editting it to the point where it's worthy to be posted even as a draft is going to be a whole other task, but at least I'm back up to easier stuff for a little while.
I probably need to start posting more frequently too, or this story is going to take forever to finish. o_o
Other parts so far:
The ficlets that started it all
Plot notes and background info
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
The tunnel lead out on to what seemed like a low rooftop, although the surface was mostly flat. Taller buildings soared up from the unseen ground below on either side. Ahead, a pale white shape stood out in sharp contrast to the dull grey of their surroundings. It was another rooftop, a little lower down and half buried where larger buildings had begun to collapse on either side. The white roof itself, however, had miraculously survived. It was obvious all of a sudden that this was where they’d been going all along.
Watanuki pointed. “There’s a way down on the other side. There should be some kind of entrance from there.”
Doumeki squinted to where Watanuki was pointing, he thought he could just about make out the place he was talking about. “That our destination?”
“Seems like it,” said Watanuki evasively. Apparently his ghost was being vague again,
Rubble around the base had built up so high that the entrance brought them in through a broken second story window. Doumeki’s feet touched down on a floor covered with a couple of decades of dust. Once his eyes had had a moment to adjust to the dimmer light, Doumeki saw that they’d arrived in a small, square room. There was a bed on one wall – a real one with a proper base and springs, but the room as a whole had an artificial quality to it somehow. Doumeki doubted anyone had ever lived here long.
“Here?” he inquired.
Watanuki shook his head. “There’s nothing in this room that would be useful. We have to go further down.”
The corridor was far darker than the room had been. Doorways lead to other rooms on both sides, but there were no windows to let light in from less than the width of a room away. The end of the corridor brought them to a corner, then another door, and through it, down a flight of stairs. Whatever they were looking for was on the bottom floor.
The ground floor was better lit than Doumeki had expected. Open spaces were larger on this level, and most of the large windows lining the outer wall were clear of the debris that had covered the other side of the building. One final journey down a darkened corridor brought them to where light spilled out of an open doorway. The room beyond –the first of a series of smaller rooms – was lit from another window, one of few in which even the glass had survived intact. Inside, row after row of shelves held an assortment of boxes and jars. They must have found their way to a store room.
“This is it,” said Watanuki, stopping and turning back to face his follower.
Doumeki picked a jar off a nearby shelf and inspected it. Most of the words on the faded label were gibberish to him, but a couple of familiar ones rang some illuminating bells. “These are medical supplies.”
“That’s what this whole building was for,” said Watanuki. “…some kind of medical stuff.”
Definitely a find, assuming any of these old drugs were still usable after all this time, or anyone remembered what they were for. But even if less than a quarter of all this was salvageable, it was still a treasure trove. With their usual diet of old meat, even a handful of vitamin pills was worth a good deal.
But just stuffing things into a bag at random couldn’t be much of a strategy. “There aren’t many things here I recognise,” Doumeki admitted.
“I can point out what’s usable,” said Watanuki.
Doumeki nodded, and shrugged the pack off his shoulders. “Your ghost was some kind of doctor?” he asked conversationally.
“No,” Watanuki replied distantly, “he just had some sort of part-time job here once.” He shook himself slightly. “I don’t ask them how they know this stuff – they just do. Start with these ones here,” he added, pointing to a shelf.
After moving through the shelves and piling a few dozen containers carefully into the pack at Watanuki’s direction, Doumeki had to ask, “Will we be able to get back here a second time?” With the pack almost full they’d barely dented the supplies here.
Watanuki paused a moment, then sighed and said, “He’ll be smug and annoying about it, but he’ll lead us back here again. Just… we can’t always do this, alright? Some of them get all tetchy and they take it out on me.”
“Noted,” said Doumeki, not really listening. Satisfied, he buckled the pack back up for the long trip home.
The hour it took on the bike to get back to the camp gave Doumeki ample time to reflect on the outcome of the day. Watanuki’s talents had gone beyond question. It would take masterful ability to fabricate such a scheme deliberately – more than Doumeki could believe worth the effort to anyone. However, nothing he’d seen had to be supernatural, and it didn’t have to be conscious deceit either. A madman with a few unnaturally developed instincts for finding stable ground could pull of most of what he’d seen Watanuki do today without ever realising how he was doing it. Just because Watanuki honestly believed he was seeing ghosts didn’t mean they had to be real. And even if the ghosts really were real, it didn’t necessarily mean he wasn’t crazy.
After all, everyone was a little crazy these days.
***
“He’s for real,” was how he summarised it to Kurogane when they got back.
“Then it must be time we taught him how to avoid tripping the security fence,” said Kurogane, which was as close to throwing a welcoming party for the newcomer as the camp was ever likely to get.
The haul from their trip was delivered to Fye and Sakura, who fell on the task of sorting through it all eagerly. Watanuki made an attempt to help, but even he was a bit unclear about some of the jars he’d instructed Doumeki to take now that the serious question of what they were for had come up. Between them, enough of the containers were identified by the end of the day (painkillers, antibiotics, diet supplements, amongst many other kinds) for the trip to be declared a great success.
It was a great relief to Watanuki to have that first trip over with, although the outcome was no surprise. Even if they did have to go back again the very next day. Kurogane and Fye came too on the other bike that time, the latter making assorted comments about double dates and Kuro finally taking him out somewhere interesting, which Watanuki did his level best not to hear. Doumeki appeared to be doing likewise.
“At least your new keeper’s better looking than any of the last lot,” said the ghost.
“Shut up,” Watanuki hissed, and tried not to notice that Doumeki now seemed to be ignoring him the same way he was ignoring the other two.
***
When they got back from the second trip at last, Doumeki and Fye went to lug their new haul over to that lab building they still wouldn’t let him near. Apparently that wasn’t the only reason he’d been excluded from the final stage of the transport process though, because Kurogane pulled him aside almost as soon as they were back and said he needed a word.
Watanuki had not been left alone for long with anyone but Doumeki since he’d joined their camp, and Kurogane’s long limbed bulk and glare were no less imposing in private. He swallowed nervously and hoped he wasn’t being too obvious. He just couldn’t read anything from any of these people. Thank god Kurogane didn’t have any reason to be angry with him.
“’A couple of times a month’, you said,” Kurogane began, sitting himself down on the edge of a table.
“On average, Watanuki repeated automatically, wondering whether he should find somewhere to sit down himself or whether he’d been left standing deliberately. “But I meant it when I said I never know…”
“You never know when and you never know what for,” Kurogane cut in, demonstrating that his memory or comprehension skills left nothing lacking. “We can’t rely on that,” he said seriously, “but we can use it. You want to stay, you pull your weight around the camp like everyone else does. When you can find us supplies, we’ll take advantage of it, but you won’t be thrown out for failing as long as you work for your keep.”
Part of Watanuki was horribly insulted. It might have had a history of causing him as much strife as good, but he’d never had his unique supernatural gift reduced to a mild annoyance with the occasional boon before. It was also so painfully rational that it was just about impossible to object to.
“Doumeki already asked me what skills I had you could make use of. There isn’t much,” he admitted. “I’ve never been expected – or really allowed – to do much before.”
“You can learn,” said Kurogane, unperturbed. “Your past doesn’t matter to any of us here, it’s what you do from here on. It’s the same rule for everyone.”
“That’s the kind of rule you make when you have more to hide from your own past than everyone else does, isn’t it?” Watanuki had said before he could stop himself, then mentally kicked himself hard for it. You just didn’t say things like that to people like this. What was it about a week or two without getting beaten that had made him this stupid?
But Kurogane practically brushed his comment aside. “If that were true, would you want to know?”
“No,” Watanuki admitted. “But – that isn’t always how even you think, is it? I know you’re all still thinking about – about what happened to that gang you found me with.”
“Will it happen again?” Kurogane had him fixed with a look there could be no escaping from.
Not as long as you don’t beat me up and threaten to get my blood everywhere, was what Watanuki wanted to say, but could he really be sure that was the only possible trigger? “I don’t really know. Nothing like that has ever happened on that kind of scale before, but….”
“Then might be more than part of the past,” said Kurogane. “If it comes up in future, we’ll deal with it when we get there.”
With that, the conversation seemed to be over.
Barely a couple of weeks at this camp, and Watanuki still felt like his head had never stopped spinning since he arrived. There was something intrinsically real and solid about these people in a way that made everything he’d ever experienced seem like part of a dream in comparison, but that only made it all the harder to believe any of it would stay real at all.
“Oi,” said Kurogane, just as he was heading back to the building he and Doumeki shared. As soon as Watanuki looked back, Kurogane looked away again. “If you ever get a message from anyone called Souma, I don’t want to know.” That said, he pulled the door shut and left Watanuki gaping where he stood.
Watanuki decided then that he wasn’t going to ask anything more about those gravestones he’d seen in the least used corner of the camp. Whoever was there had left him alone so far, and now he certainly didn’t want to give them any excuse to do otherwise.
And that, six parts in and somewhere north of 13,000 words in, brings me to the end of what I have mentally labeled as 'Part 1' of the story of a whole. More specifically, based on the way I have the plan broken down by what major plot point goes where, that's part 1 of 4 (or possibly even 5, since part 4 may be trying to cover a bit much material) parts in total. The other parts of the story may or may not be of comparable length, though anyone who's ever seen any amateur writer try to predict just how long her story is going to be at completion before should know just how unreliable a guideline that's likely to be. Still, safe to say I have a *long* way left to go on this.
The good news is my buffer of material written-but-not-yet-posted is still looking reasonably healthy, because I'm through a lot of stuff from the start of Part 2 which I was a little lost in before. Editting it to the point where it's worthy to be posted even as a draft is going to be a whole other task, but at least I'm back up to easier stuff for a little while.
I probably need to start posting more frequently too, or this story is going to take forever to finish. o_o
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no subject
Date: 2007-09-13 01:47 pm (UTC)<3
no subject
Date: 2007-09-13 03:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-09-13 03:12 pm (UTC)I don't have time to read now, but I'll be back~~
<3
no subject
Date: 2007-09-13 03:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 02:00 am (UTC)Your grasp of him is so amazing~
WIN. <3
Uwah, Watanuki is even more adorable~
Icon snap!
Date: 2007-09-14 03:09 am (UTC)Uwah, Watanuki is even more adorable~
Is that even possible? ^^; Oh dear, wait until I get to the stuff he's got coming in the next couple of parts.
Re: Icon snap!
Date: 2007-09-14 03:20 am (UTC)Is that even possible? ^^; Oh dear, wait until I get to the stuff he's got coming in the next couple of parts.
Damn right it is. :D (That sounds kind of ominous. Is it?)
no subject
Date: 2007-09-13 04:59 pm (UTC)previously silentstalker here... *cough* Just thought I'd have to tell yousooner or later lolhow thoroughly obsessed I am with this awesome AU. :)I love the many ways Watanuki's true character seeps through his April Fool persona... which amuses Doumeki
just like in the good old days that never were in this universeXDEveryone is so perfectly in character while being in entirely different universe, living different lives and having other likes/dislikes and skills that it's bloody amazing~ :)
We've never seen Kurogane and Watanuki interact past "Gimme black manju too!" - "Ah?" in canon yet they're doing pretty damn well here. XD Same with others - great job imho!
Hmm Please forgive me for not being coherent enough - I tend to go quite crazy about things I like XD And this AU is damn addictive... *_*
no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 02:41 am (UTC)previously silentstalker here... *cough*I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about. =P Hi again, you!
We've never seen Kurogane and Watanuki interact past "Gimme black manju too!" - "Ah?" in canon yet they're doing pretty damn well here. XD
Hm, maybe a bit in the Horitsuba drama CDs? But in this world it's kind of like I just dumped everyone in together and let them go for it, and everything fell into place. ^^;
Hmm Please forgive me for not being coherent enough - I tend to go quite crazy about things I like XD And this AU is damn addictive... *_*
Hey, good to know you felt it worth de-lurking for. ^_^ I'm glad I decided to post it this way, it's been entirely worth it for the response it's been getting (even more impressive considering I haven't cross posted it anywhere other than my own journal yet). Gives me all the more incentive to keep writing and posting at this rate too.
no subject
Date: 2007-09-13 05:11 pm (UTC)I really really like this. It seems like its going to be a monster of a story, and I can't say I'm not glad. The little tidbits you show about the characters always make want to know *more * so yay for more frequent updates.
Do you mind if I friend you?
no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 02:45 am (UTC)'Fraid not. I really didn't think I'd made it that hard. ^^;
I really really like this. It seems like its going to be a monster of a story, and I can't say I'm not glad.
No kidding. ^^; I'd be very worried I'd bitten off more than I could chew getting into a project this big, but it seems to be going so well so far that I'm not worrying too hard. The response to it so far has been wonderful too. ^_^
Do you mind if I friend you?
Not at all!
no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 02:23 am (UTC)[dies]
This is incredible and augh! I love post-apocalyptic ANYTHING. (And I blame you for that...) Cannot wait for more. And your characterisation is absolutely wonderful. I love how Fai seems to be less angsty, and Sakura still so innocent. And poor scarred Watanuki. Seriously. I am addicted.
no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 02:52 am (UTC)^^; Well, yeah - weekly schedule and all that. I'm never going to get through this monster otherwise. >.>
I love post-apocalyptic ANYTHING. (And I blame you for that...)
Well, I blame
And your characterisation is absolutely wonderful.
I always feel a bit funny taking any credit for that, because everything just seems to have been falling into place so far without me having to think about it so hard. On the other hand, I'm sure I'd never have dared start something this long if it hadn't been working that way.
I love how Fai seems to be less angsty,
So far, anyhow - he didn't seem too angsty in early Tsubasa chapters either. But overall, I think he's a bit better balanced in this universe, which is quite an achievement considering the setting and all.
Seriously. I am addicted.
I seem to be hearing a lot of that. =D Only fair though, I'm pretty addicted to the idea on my end too.
no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 02:59 am (UTC)XD I've got to thank her (?) someday for that.
He doesn't seem like he's purposely overdoing the happy act, is what I mean, and that leads me to believe that he doesn't have as much need for it. But yes, so far...backstory is wonderfully unknown for me.
It's an addictive idea.
am not writing post-apocalyptic fic of my own, oh no, not at all...no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 02:33 am (UTC)Her is correct. And I suppose I'll have to yield to my own bunny someday, since I haven't completely managed to pass it off to Joop and you!
no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 05:01 am (UTC)Yes, you must, you must! There is absolutely nothing better than post-apocalyptic fic. Nothing at all.
no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 10:20 pm (UTC)*grins* To the sisterhood of evil Donut Ficcers?
Not even post-apocalyptic fic with well-written pron?
no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 10:32 pm (UTC)But that fits in the category, doesn't it?
no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 10:37 pm (UTC)Yup, it does seem to, at that.
(And my new scenario came from wondering what exactly the baddies in More Full of Weeping were up to. So I gots to finish that first, too.)
no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 10:49 pm (UTC)(Which new scenario? Am I missing something? Sounds exciting, though.)
no subject
Date: 2007-09-16 04:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-09-16 04:55 pm (UTC)The post-apocalyptic muse has me in a stranglehold. Not only have I got two fic ideas, it's also making me write original fiction.
no subject
Date: 2007-09-16 12:53 am (UTC)You people ask so much! ;_;
no subject
Date: 2007-09-16 04:44 pm (UTC)Actually -- and I may be shunned and stoned for saying so -- I'm not sure this fic really calls for detailed pr0n. Fading to black would probably do. Not that I'd say no to Joop!porn, but... there's so much else going on.
no subject
Date: 2007-09-14 03:02 pm (UTC)“Then it must be time we taught him how to avoid tripping the security fence,” said Kurogane
Doumeki and Kurogane, both masters of saying so much with so little have an important conversation and its 2 sentences long yet conveys everything they need to convey. :) I love it.
Kurogane and Fye came too on the other bike that time, the latter making assorted comments about double dates and Kuro finally taking him out somewhere interesting
HAHAHAHAH. This line is just great. Yea! for Kurogane and Fye interaction. And everyone else just tries to ignore them, hehehe.
The conversation between Watanuki and Kurogane was very nice and the unexpected glimpse of Kurogane's vulnerability was touching.
I'm glad to hear the rest of the fic is going so well. :)
no subject
Date: 2007-09-15 03:35 am (UTC)*grin* I have been pleasantly amazed by how easy it's been to get Doumeki interacting with the Tsubasa cast - he's never even spoken to any of them in regular canon, but here he fits right on in like he's known them all for years (which he has in this world, so).
HAHAHAHAH. This line is just great. Yea! for Kurogane and Fye interaction. And everyone else just tries to ignore them, hehehe.
Mostly everyone tries to ignore Fye, since even Kurogane is trying his best to ignore Fye in that particular scene. XD
The conversation between Watanuki and Kurogane was very nice and the unexpected glimpse of Kurogane's vulnerability was touching.
Mm, foreshadowing.
I'm glad to hear the rest of the fic is going so well. :)
I'm glad too, believe me. There's so much left to be written that if it was making me work to get a chapter out a week already, I'd have hell getting to the end of the story. So far though, so good.
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Date: 2007-09-15 02:45 am (UTC)I think Watanuki's loss of brain/mouth filter is a good sign; I'm sure it scares him to death, but he needs to be able to feel comfortable,and if lapses around someone as
awestrikingintimidating as Kurogane, at some level he must feel pretty safe. I liked the whole conversation with Kurogane, and Watanuki's mix of admiration and resentment at the entirely rational approach to his gift.So it was the presence/promise of Watanuki's blood that caused the orgy of violence? I can see why he wouldn't care to say it out loud -- it's not a pretty thought, and honestly, it would sound like a lie.
Kuro and Fye are together, ne? As are Sakura and Syaoran? (Though I can't really picture your version of these two in bed together.) That might make for some nights of really working at not paying attention to noises...
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Date: 2007-09-15 03:25 am (UTC)Oh dear, I'm going to have to go back through these parts and find somewhere I can fill in more hints. But basically, don't think 'part-time at a hospital', just think 'part-time'. As in, part-time just about everywhere.
I think Watanuki's loss of brain/mouth filter is a good sign; I'm sure it scares him to death, but he needs to be able to feel comfortable,and if lapses around someone as
awestrikingintimidating as Kurogane, at some level he must feel pretty safe.Not much more I can say to that than 'so very true'. *g*
So it was the presence/promise of Watanuki's blood that caused the orgy of violence? I can see why he wouldn't care to say it out loud -- it's not a pretty thought, and honestly, it would sound like a lie.
Yeah, I did hint at that before with the part about it being not until they threatened him with a knife that things went bad. It may even have been a sort of dual effect of spirits who wanted to protect him *and* nastier ones who were out after his blood all going nuts in there together that made it quite that nasty. But aside from that, half Watanuki's problem is that he doesn't want to be saying 'you can't ever hurt me or you'll die', because it sounds far too much like the kind of lie that would be used to scare people into doing what he says.
Kuro and Fye are together, ne?
Um... sort of. Obviously there's something going on, but there are some unresolved issues on that front which still get in the way. It'll all be explained eventually. There was even a spot of fic ninjaing (http://cheloya.livejournal.com/1232006.html?thread=3955846#t3955846) to that effect earlier this week. Fye is just a hopeless flirt in any world.
That might make for some nights of really working at not paying attention to noises...
XD Not so bad, they're all in separate buildings (well, more like small, stone or brick huts built fairly close together) for sleeping purposes, so there's a decent amount of privacy.
As are Sakura and Syaoran? (Though I can't really picture your version of these two in bed together.)
Probably just in a 'snuggle up together and fall asleep, and it is all horribly cute' sort of way. They're still pretty young.
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Date: 2007-09-15 05:04 am (UTC)IS IT TOUYA???
DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 06:00 am (UTC)Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 06:19 am (UTC)oh, but that's mildly depressing. Mostly incredibly fun, though.
Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 06:22 am (UTC)Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 06:37 am (UTC)Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 10:05 am (UTC)Oh, trust me, he is. He takes that little being dead thing completely in his stride.
Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 01:05 pm (UTC)Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 01:09 pm (UTC)Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 01:14 pm (UTC)I think you said that you couldn't fit Yuuko in anywhere. If that's still true, and if it applies to Clow Reed too, since I don't think you mentioned him, could they fit in as Watanuki's parents who died sometime ago? (I assume the parents are dead, in any case.)
Re: DINGDINGDING!
Date: 2007-09-15 03:27 pm (UTC)...I really can't picture Yuuko and Clow as Watanuki's parents in any serious universe. XD In this universe, their roles will be best defined by their absence.
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Date: 2007-09-15 10:04 pm (UTC)Oh! Touya? That would explain the whole 'approving of Watanuki's new gang' thing. Big brothery in all worlds, ne?
The fic ninja-ing was wonderful. That was just a great bit of conversation, which said everything without saying anything right out. Loved Fye's final line especially! All for the life-affirming porn!
A little sad about the privacy -- had hoped for a late-night view of Doumeki and Watanuki working very hard to ignore noises and each other. But I'm just wicked that way.
yeah, like a pile of kittens. With grenades, in Syaoran's case.
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Date: 2007-09-16 01:28 am (UTC)Okay, so only a little extra hint required then. ^_^
The fic ninja-ing was wonderful. That was just a great bit of conversation, which said everything without saying anything right out. Loved Fye's final line especially! All for the life-affirming porn!
I have quite a few little snippets like that from later on sitting around in a couple of word documents. Makes me feel like I have some idea where I'm going. ^^;
A little sad about the privacy -- had hoped for a late-night view of Doumeki and Watanuki working very hard to ignore noises and each other. But I'm just wicked that way.
Hah, you are thoroughly twisted. =P I'm sure Fye has more than enough trouble talking Kuro into doing anything fun even without those little privacy problems to put a further damper on things.
I have actually had a vague mental image for a while of Syaoran accidentally walking in on Kurogane and Fye or Doumeki and Watanuki when they're somewhere post-coital, but I can't for the life of me decide whether this leads to him panicking, jumping outside and slamming the door or being utterly blase about the situation and carrying on like nothing out of the ordinary has been going on. He's an odd sort of kid. XD
With grenades, in Syaoran's case.
But he's such a *cute* little natural-born killing machine!
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Date: 2007-09-16 04:41 pm (UTC)Yup, only a little.
Errr, you noticed? ^___^
*laughs* I kind of think this Syaoran lacks the social savior-faire to realize there is something awkward. I can just picture him just saying or doing whatever it was he came to do, and just tossing out one of those impossible to answer questions as he's getting ready to leave. Tossing it out with only the mildest of curiosity.
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Date: 2008-06-20 07:34 am (UTC)