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rallamajoopThis part came out a bit disjointed. This one and the part after it both gave me some trouble, and probably need a couple of extra scenes in order to pace them out properly. But I think that will be left until sometime after the draft phase.
Other parts so far:
The ficlets that started it all
Plot notes and background info
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
It was about a week later, to Fye’s unmitigated delight, that Watanuki lead them on another trip to an old junkyard which supplied a number of parts he needed to repair a much lamented solar panel which had been broken since the previous year. Although it was only half a day’s travel away from them, no-one in the camp had had the slightest idea the place was there. Better yet, it was accessible enough that they’d be able to go back there if they wanted to in the future. Fye practically had to be dragged away.
A third discovery of a mostly buried tanker of surprisingly well-preserved fuel would have gone down better had it not required half a fuel tank’s journey to get there and back, or had they owned more vehicles which hadn’t been converted to run on Fye’s batteries. Still, the larger vehicles they’d recovered from Watanuki’s previous gang could make use of it, should they ever be needed, and the Tower and the Diet Building would pay well for information about it if they needed that bargaining chip in the future. It was far from being a wasted trip.
The one after took them a day and a half of travel, camping out in the wild on the night in between. In reward, they uncovered a crate full of small paper filters – items Doumeki identified as accessories to an old chemical scanning device Fye had had to abandon a few years previously when their original filter supply ran out. The filters had to be soaked in whatever mystery substance needed identifying, and could only be used once before they disintegrated. It was a long trip for only what amounted to a disposable luxury item, but a few months worth of knowing for sure just how much poison was in the meat they brought home was novelty enough that no-one had any complaints.
Watanuki learned to start a fire, skin a carcass, change a battery and hold up Fye’s toolbox long enough to give Sakura a break. He was neither a fast learner nor a good pupil, and as his initial nervousness wore off he would whinge and moan loudly if given a task he didn’t feel he deserved or knew how to do. However, even at his bitchiest, once he’d taken on a job he’d stick through it until it was done, however unsatisfied he might be with the result. One way or another he made himself useful enough to leave his worth to them in no doubt. Somehow, even Watanuki’s ghosts worked their way into camp life.
Since a lot of the camp work suitable for someone not qualified to use a gun revolved around Fye’s endless quest to keep all his solar panels up and running, Watanuki saw a lot of him – and them – as he settled in. This also gave him ample opportunity to discover just how intricate and ingenious the whole system was, much to Fye’s delight. He was not remotely modest about any of his achievements, and chances to show off to anyone new were far too rare to be wasted.
“I really have never seen anything on this scale before,” Watanuki admitted one time, while Fye preened. “A couple of camps I’ve been with before had one or two, but they broke down all the time and no-one ever knew quite how to fix them. To keep this many working all the time is amazing.”
“Well, I did grow up in a Complex not too far from here,” Fye admitted casually. “They still preserve all kinds of technical knowledge there, you know. My measly little bank of panels is nothing compared to the nest up on their roof.”
It really said a lot about this camp, Watanuki thought to himself as he tried to regain his mental equilibrium, that even after so long here they could still spring things like this on him. “You… really?”
“Oh yes.”
“But then… what are you doing out here?” Watanuki blurted out, and had to kick himself again. It was almost like he’d left all his tact and common sense back at that last camp.
“Keeping our solar panels up and running with most of my time,” said Fye, not the least bothered by either the question or the task of crafting a suitably evasive answer.
There was an uncomfortable silence – uncomfortable for Watanuki, anyway, as Fye went on with his work without the slightest sign any faux pas had been made.
“Do you ever miss it?” Watanuki asked quietly. There had always been something horribly sinister about the Complexes to him – something not even the Tower or any other hostile gang could replicate, and yet, stories about them were such that it seemed implausible that anyone would ever voluntarily leave.
“The Complex?” said Fye. “No, no, can’t say I do. Life there has its perks, but life is so much more relaxed out here. More exciting too.”
Watanuki didn’t want to know what Fye’s idea of excitement entailed.
“And out here, I’ve got our Kurogane – and all the kids as well,” Fye added fondly. “No competition at all.”
“Ah,” said Watanuki, not sure what else to say.
The April Fool was not without his less endearing oddities, however, hovering being one of them. Particularly when, like on one occasion after that fourth mission, he was specifically supposed to be somewhere else.
Replacing a damaged wheel on the bike wasn’t a job that required Doumeki to look back over his shoulder much, but when Watanuki was still skulking around below him on the third glance back, it became difficult to ignore.
“Don’t you have something to skin before dinner?” he asked, turning around properly.
Watanuki refused to look guilty. “Would you believe me if I told you there’s a man with no legs and eight eyes who keeps staring at me every time I go near it?”
“No,” said Doumeki.
“Why not?” Watanuki complained. “Why would I make up something like that?”
“To get out of work.”
“And what good would that do? I’ll still have to do it later – but by then, maybe he’ll leave me alone!”
“If you leave it long enough, Sakura might take pity on you and do it for you.”
“I wouldn’t take advantage of her like that!”
“Then do it yourself. Bring it over here to do if it makes a difference.”
“And what if he follows me over?”
“Stare back at him,” Doumeki suggested.
Watanuki reluctantly complied. No further mention of the legless man was made.
Although Doumeki didn’t mention the incident specifically, the subject of Watanuki’s ghosts came up again later that evening while he was talking with two of the others. Kurogane shared his concerns, though he didn’t have much to add. Watanuki’s ghosts taking a role in camp life other than leading them to supplies made them all a little uncomfortable.
“He believes they’re real,” said Doumeki. “He’s not making that part up.”
“But – they must be, right?” said Syaoran. “How else could he find all those things?”
“Kamui and Fuuma think we must have a contact at the Complexes because they don’t know about Chi,” Kurogane pointed out.
“But we know about Chi,” Syaoran protested, not seeing the parallel. “The only reason they make the wrong guess is because we don’t tell them. Kimihiro couldn’t be hiding anything like that.”
In many respects, Syaoran’s had less education than any of the rest of them – the borderline-amnesic state he’d been found in made sure of that. The skills he had he took obsessive pride in, but anyone who could do anything better than him – or anything he couldn’t do at all – he held in a position of utmost reverence. Watanuki made that category easily.
Technically, Syaoran should have encountered enough of the dangerous madmen found wandering the wilderness on occasion to know just how many strange and terrible things were possible for such people – people who talked gibberish and fought with far too much strength for their emancipated frames, who must have survived on nothing but poisoned food and their own madness for years to reach that state. But there were some among them who were not so obviously crazy.
“There’s the possibility even Watanuki doesn’t know the real way he does some things,” Doumeki explained. “The ghosts are only real to him, so there’s no way for us to verify his story.”
“But…” said Syaoran, apparently wrestling with something important. “Kimihiro isn’t the only one who sees ghosts.”
Doumeki exchanged a glance with Kurogane. “You haven’t said anything before.”
Syaoran shook his head. “It isn’t me. But Sakura says she’s seen things like ghosts many times. You remember last year, when she got lost in the deadlands after that surprise attack?”
Doumeki nodded. He remembered only too well. He remembered being uncomfortably relieved that Syaoran had been knocked unconscious in the fight and stayed that way until after Sakura had been safely returned.
“She told me when she found her way back it was because a line of figures who never spoke and who she could barely see through pointed the way for her,” said Syaoran. “She was so tired by then that I wondered if she could have dreamt it all.”
“But if she did, how did she find her way?” said Kurogane, finishing his thought for him.
Syaoran looked at them defiantly.
Doumeki didn’t like this turn of events at all. The last thing they needed was Sakura going crazy – she’d drag Syaoran straight down with her, and he’d always been halfway crazed as it was. Still, Doumeki figured, he wasn’t the one following a near stranger across the countryside on what amounted to little more they could quantify than a series of crazy hunches. He didn’t really have much room to complain.
***
(Possibly there needs to be an intermediate scene or two between that one and this next one, but that will have to wait to be filled in later)
Watanuki slumped down by the far side of the storage building and let out a sigh of relief. Free moments like this were to be savoured. He hadn’t known the meaning of hard work before he got there, and in his crazier moments he sometimes even felt as thought it had been better in the days when his ability to sit somewhere out of the way and not make much noise had been his second most prized talents.
The last thing he wanted was to see the mad kid come around a corner, spot him sitting there and make straight for him.
“Kimihiro, can I talk to you about something?” he asked seriously. The ‘something’ was made to sound important enough that he’d need a very good excuse to avoid this conversation.
“I suppose so,” Watanuki said uncertainly.
Syaoran nodded and turned to head towards the edge of the camp. Apparently Watanuki was expected to follow.
What was this about anyway? Even in a camp where just about everyone seemed to have their own personal kind of crazy, this boy creeped him out. There was an aura about him – an unpleasant one that looked like any number of ghost bodies, all so entangled he could never count them nor even tell one from the next, and it never went away, only faded when Watanuki wasn’t concentrating. The boy was a killer, you could tell that much just by meeting him, but Watanuki had met plenty of killers in his time and none of the others had an aura like that. No-one could be haunted by that much spiritual power for any reason that was nice.
With such thoughts running through his head, it threw him completely when Syaoran stopped just inside the security boundary, turned and began their conversation with, “If your eyes can see ghosts, do you see anything on me?”
Watanuki could only gape at him in shock.
“She doesn’t talk about it much,” Syaoran went on, as if Watanuki’s eyes weren’t ready to bug out of his head, “but Sakura is something like you. She sees things the rest of us can’t – ghosts and spirits, and she gets feelings from some places. It doesn’t happen to her very often, and they don’t help her find things like they help you, so she doesn’t talk about it much.”
While Watanuki was still trying to digest those first couple of bombshells, he kept talking. “There’s been a hole in my memory since before we ever joined Kurogane’s camp. Before that, I only remember things in bits and pieces. I don’t know where we came from, but it was somewhere bad. Something must have happened when we left – or I must have done something – or why wouldn’t I be able to remember?
“Sakura can’t tell me much either. Whatever happened there, it scared her. I don’t want to make her remember something like that,” If Watanuki had ever had any doubt that Sakura meant more than everything else in the world to this boy, it would have collapsed under the sound of his voice and the look on his face then. “But just sometimes, she looks at me like she’s seeing something that scares her. Can you tell me what she’s seeing?”
The last part was delivered looking Watanuki straight in the eye.
“There are spirits,” Watanuki had blurted out before he’d even thought about it. “They’re faint, but they’re all over you.”
Syaoran took this remarkably well. “What do you mean by spirits? Are they people’s ghosts?”
“Probably,” said Watanuki. “They’re all blurred together, I can’t make them out well.”
“Are they people I’ve killed?”
“They might be.” Even though he’d been thinking just as much minutes before, suddenly Watanuki needed there to be another explanation, however much less likely it might be. “Or they might be people from a grave you visited. They might not be people at all.”
“Is there anything that would make them go away?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never seen anything like this before. I’m sorry,” Watanuki finished miserably.
“It isn’t anything you need to be sorry for,” said Syaoran, matter-of-factly. “I just wanted to know what she saw. Thank you.”
Of course, afterwards it occurred to Watanuki that maybe he shouldn’t have told Syaoran at all. If Sakura hadn’t wanted to tell him herself, then surely it wasn’t someone else’s place to get involved. What he’d described to Syaoran would be a terrifying thing to find out about yourself – not that Syaoran had seemed that bothered. What did it take to faze that boy?
Then, in return, he’d been given one of Sakura’s own secrets – one it didn’t seem like anyone else in the camp was privy to. He’d never even heard of anyone else like him who saw ghosts before, but how would he even bring up the subject after finding out this way? Would it be better to let her know he knew the secret, or keep the secret that Syaoran had shared it? Who’s confidence would he be betraying worst?
Realistically though, he was forced to conclude, dejection settling over him, he may not have had much other choice about what he’d said to Syaoran. He’d always been a lousy liar, and refusing to answer outright in the face of that stare would have been more than he could manage.
Other parts so far:
The ficlets that started it all
Plot notes and background info
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
It was about a week later, to Fye’s unmitigated delight, that Watanuki lead them on another trip to an old junkyard which supplied a number of parts he needed to repair a much lamented solar panel which had been broken since the previous year. Although it was only half a day’s travel away from them, no-one in the camp had had the slightest idea the place was there. Better yet, it was accessible enough that they’d be able to go back there if they wanted to in the future. Fye practically had to be dragged away.
A third discovery of a mostly buried tanker of surprisingly well-preserved fuel would have gone down better had it not required half a fuel tank’s journey to get there and back, or had they owned more vehicles which hadn’t been converted to run on Fye’s batteries. Still, the larger vehicles they’d recovered from Watanuki’s previous gang could make use of it, should they ever be needed, and the Tower and the Diet Building would pay well for information about it if they needed that bargaining chip in the future. It was far from being a wasted trip.
The one after took them a day and a half of travel, camping out in the wild on the night in between. In reward, they uncovered a crate full of small paper filters – items Doumeki identified as accessories to an old chemical scanning device Fye had had to abandon a few years previously when their original filter supply ran out. The filters had to be soaked in whatever mystery substance needed identifying, and could only be used once before they disintegrated. It was a long trip for only what amounted to a disposable luxury item, but a few months worth of knowing for sure just how much poison was in the meat they brought home was novelty enough that no-one had any complaints.
Watanuki learned to start a fire, skin a carcass, change a battery and hold up Fye’s toolbox long enough to give Sakura a break. He was neither a fast learner nor a good pupil, and as his initial nervousness wore off he would whinge and moan loudly if given a task he didn’t feel he deserved or knew how to do. However, even at his bitchiest, once he’d taken on a job he’d stick through it until it was done, however unsatisfied he might be with the result. One way or another he made himself useful enough to leave his worth to them in no doubt. Somehow, even Watanuki’s ghosts worked their way into camp life.
Since a lot of the camp work suitable for someone not qualified to use a gun revolved around Fye’s endless quest to keep all his solar panels up and running, Watanuki saw a lot of him – and them – as he settled in. This also gave him ample opportunity to discover just how intricate and ingenious the whole system was, much to Fye’s delight. He was not remotely modest about any of his achievements, and chances to show off to anyone new were far too rare to be wasted.
“I really have never seen anything on this scale before,” Watanuki admitted one time, while Fye preened. “A couple of camps I’ve been with before had one or two, but they broke down all the time and no-one ever knew quite how to fix them. To keep this many working all the time is amazing.”
“Well, I did grow up in a Complex not too far from here,” Fye admitted casually. “They still preserve all kinds of technical knowledge there, you know. My measly little bank of panels is nothing compared to the nest up on their roof.”
It really said a lot about this camp, Watanuki thought to himself as he tried to regain his mental equilibrium, that even after so long here they could still spring things like this on him. “You… really?”
“Oh yes.”
“But then… what are you doing out here?” Watanuki blurted out, and had to kick himself again. It was almost like he’d left all his tact and common sense back at that last camp.
“Keeping our solar panels up and running with most of my time,” said Fye, not the least bothered by either the question or the task of crafting a suitably evasive answer.
There was an uncomfortable silence – uncomfortable for Watanuki, anyway, as Fye went on with his work without the slightest sign any faux pas had been made.
“Do you ever miss it?” Watanuki asked quietly. There had always been something horribly sinister about the Complexes to him – something not even the Tower or any other hostile gang could replicate, and yet, stories about them were such that it seemed implausible that anyone would ever voluntarily leave.
“The Complex?” said Fye. “No, no, can’t say I do. Life there has its perks, but life is so much more relaxed out here. More exciting too.”
Watanuki didn’t want to know what Fye’s idea of excitement entailed.
“And out here, I’ve got our Kurogane – and all the kids as well,” Fye added fondly. “No competition at all.”
“Ah,” said Watanuki, not sure what else to say.
The April Fool was not without his less endearing oddities, however, hovering being one of them. Particularly when, like on one occasion after that fourth mission, he was specifically supposed to be somewhere else.
Replacing a damaged wheel on the bike wasn’t a job that required Doumeki to look back over his shoulder much, but when Watanuki was still skulking around below him on the third glance back, it became difficult to ignore.
“Don’t you have something to skin before dinner?” he asked, turning around properly.
Watanuki refused to look guilty. “Would you believe me if I told you there’s a man with no legs and eight eyes who keeps staring at me every time I go near it?”
“No,” said Doumeki.
“Why not?” Watanuki complained. “Why would I make up something like that?”
“To get out of work.”
“And what good would that do? I’ll still have to do it later – but by then, maybe he’ll leave me alone!”
“If you leave it long enough, Sakura might take pity on you and do it for you.”
“I wouldn’t take advantage of her like that!”
“Then do it yourself. Bring it over here to do if it makes a difference.”
“And what if he follows me over?”
“Stare back at him,” Doumeki suggested.
Watanuki reluctantly complied. No further mention of the legless man was made.
Although Doumeki didn’t mention the incident specifically, the subject of Watanuki’s ghosts came up again later that evening while he was talking with two of the others. Kurogane shared his concerns, though he didn’t have much to add. Watanuki’s ghosts taking a role in camp life other than leading them to supplies made them all a little uncomfortable.
“He believes they’re real,” said Doumeki. “He’s not making that part up.”
“But – they must be, right?” said Syaoran. “How else could he find all those things?”
“Kamui and Fuuma think we must have a contact at the Complexes because they don’t know about Chi,” Kurogane pointed out.
“But we know about Chi,” Syaoran protested, not seeing the parallel. “The only reason they make the wrong guess is because we don’t tell them. Kimihiro couldn’t be hiding anything like that.”
In many respects, Syaoran’s had less education than any of the rest of them – the borderline-amnesic state he’d been found in made sure of that. The skills he had he took obsessive pride in, but anyone who could do anything better than him – or anything he couldn’t do at all – he held in a position of utmost reverence. Watanuki made that category easily.
Technically, Syaoran should have encountered enough of the dangerous madmen found wandering the wilderness on occasion to know just how many strange and terrible things were possible for such people – people who talked gibberish and fought with far too much strength for their emancipated frames, who must have survived on nothing but poisoned food and their own madness for years to reach that state. But there were some among them who were not so obviously crazy.
“There’s the possibility even Watanuki doesn’t know the real way he does some things,” Doumeki explained. “The ghosts are only real to him, so there’s no way for us to verify his story.”
“But…” said Syaoran, apparently wrestling with something important. “Kimihiro isn’t the only one who sees ghosts.”
Doumeki exchanged a glance with Kurogane. “You haven’t said anything before.”
Syaoran shook his head. “It isn’t me. But Sakura says she’s seen things like ghosts many times. You remember last year, when she got lost in the deadlands after that surprise attack?”
Doumeki nodded. He remembered only too well. He remembered being uncomfortably relieved that Syaoran had been knocked unconscious in the fight and stayed that way until after Sakura had been safely returned.
“She told me when she found her way back it was because a line of figures who never spoke and who she could barely see through pointed the way for her,” said Syaoran. “She was so tired by then that I wondered if she could have dreamt it all.”
“But if she did, how did she find her way?” said Kurogane, finishing his thought for him.
Syaoran looked at them defiantly.
Doumeki didn’t like this turn of events at all. The last thing they needed was Sakura going crazy – she’d drag Syaoran straight down with her, and he’d always been halfway crazed as it was. Still, Doumeki figured, he wasn’t the one following a near stranger across the countryside on what amounted to little more they could quantify than a series of crazy hunches. He didn’t really have much room to complain.
***
(Possibly there needs to be an intermediate scene or two between that one and this next one, but that will have to wait to be filled in later)
Watanuki slumped down by the far side of the storage building and let out a sigh of relief. Free moments like this were to be savoured. He hadn’t known the meaning of hard work before he got there, and in his crazier moments he sometimes even felt as thought it had been better in the days when his ability to sit somewhere out of the way and not make much noise had been his second most prized talents.
The last thing he wanted was to see the mad kid come around a corner, spot him sitting there and make straight for him.
“Kimihiro, can I talk to you about something?” he asked seriously. The ‘something’ was made to sound important enough that he’d need a very good excuse to avoid this conversation.
“I suppose so,” Watanuki said uncertainly.
Syaoran nodded and turned to head towards the edge of the camp. Apparently Watanuki was expected to follow.
What was this about anyway? Even in a camp where just about everyone seemed to have their own personal kind of crazy, this boy creeped him out. There was an aura about him – an unpleasant one that looked like any number of ghost bodies, all so entangled he could never count them nor even tell one from the next, and it never went away, only faded when Watanuki wasn’t concentrating. The boy was a killer, you could tell that much just by meeting him, but Watanuki had met plenty of killers in his time and none of the others had an aura like that. No-one could be haunted by that much spiritual power for any reason that was nice.
With such thoughts running through his head, it threw him completely when Syaoran stopped just inside the security boundary, turned and began their conversation with, “If your eyes can see ghosts, do you see anything on me?”
Watanuki could only gape at him in shock.
“She doesn’t talk about it much,” Syaoran went on, as if Watanuki’s eyes weren’t ready to bug out of his head, “but Sakura is something like you. She sees things the rest of us can’t – ghosts and spirits, and she gets feelings from some places. It doesn’t happen to her very often, and they don’t help her find things like they help you, so she doesn’t talk about it much.”
While Watanuki was still trying to digest those first couple of bombshells, he kept talking. “There’s been a hole in my memory since before we ever joined Kurogane’s camp. Before that, I only remember things in bits and pieces. I don’t know where we came from, but it was somewhere bad. Something must have happened when we left – or I must have done something – or why wouldn’t I be able to remember?
“Sakura can’t tell me much either. Whatever happened there, it scared her. I don’t want to make her remember something like that,” If Watanuki had ever had any doubt that Sakura meant more than everything else in the world to this boy, it would have collapsed under the sound of his voice and the look on his face then. “But just sometimes, she looks at me like she’s seeing something that scares her. Can you tell me what she’s seeing?”
The last part was delivered looking Watanuki straight in the eye.
“There are spirits,” Watanuki had blurted out before he’d even thought about it. “They’re faint, but they’re all over you.”
Syaoran took this remarkably well. “What do you mean by spirits? Are they people’s ghosts?”
“Probably,” said Watanuki. “They’re all blurred together, I can’t make them out well.”
“Are they people I’ve killed?”
“They might be.” Even though he’d been thinking just as much minutes before, suddenly Watanuki needed there to be another explanation, however much less likely it might be. “Or they might be people from a grave you visited. They might not be people at all.”
“Is there anything that would make them go away?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never seen anything like this before. I’m sorry,” Watanuki finished miserably.
“It isn’t anything you need to be sorry for,” said Syaoran, matter-of-factly. “I just wanted to know what she saw. Thank you.”
Of course, afterwards it occurred to Watanuki that maybe he shouldn’t have told Syaoran at all. If Sakura hadn’t wanted to tell him herself, then surely it wasn’t someone else’s place to get involved. What he’d described to Syaoran would be a terrifying thing to find out about yourself – not that Syaoran had seemed that bothered. What did it take to faze that boy?
Then, in return, he’d been given one of Sakura’s own secrets – one it didn’t seem like anyone else in the camp was privy to. He’d never even heard of anyone else like him who saw ghosts before, but how would he even bring up the subject after finding out this way? Would it be better to let her know he knew the secret, or keep the secret that Syaoran had shared it? Who’s confidence would he be betraying worst?
Realistically though, he was forced to conclude, dejection settling over him, he may not have had much other choice about what he’d said to Syaoran. He’d always been a lousy liar, and refusing to answer outright in the face of that stare would have been more than he could manage.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-09-20 07:38 pm (UTC)kori
p.s. sorry if my english is a bit iffy, it's not my mother tongue so I'm prone to awkward phrasing...
no subject
Date: 2007-09-21 01:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-09-20 09:45 pm (UTC)(As for the internediate scene - dinner? Wash-up? I know this 'verse isn't too conducive to domesticity, but. Rubbish dumping/incinerating? I don't know whether there are nasties that manage to live in the wastelands that'd be attracted by food, but. Well, anyway.)
no subject
Date: 2007-09-21 01:18 am (UTC)Um... am I? XD
And of course, the covert references to Kuro/Fai don't hurt, either. ^__^
Hah, not much to that either really - Fye's just being Fye.
The intermediate scene is probably going to be whatever Watanuki was working on that wore him out so badly, but I will leave the details until
I can be bothered with themlater.no subject
Date: 2007-09-21 06:20 am (UTC)XDDDD This gives a whole new meaning to the idea that there is only hitsuzen, ahaha - even though what I actually meant to type there was Yuuko's give-and-take system. Which is not actually hitsuzen at all. (This is what I get for reading before I've had all my tea in the morning, I suppose.)
*giggle* All right then. I wasn't sure if you needed scenes to pad them out, or whether you just hadn't written them yet. ♥
no subject
Date: 2007-09-20 10:53 pm (UTC)I find myself strangely attached to this phrase. XD It suits his never-failing poker face so well... *snickers*
Doumeki The King of Levelheaded (jerks - Watanuki would probably add) is doing a fine job trying to make sense of the whole April Fool mystery. I wonder how much longer he can keep this up in the face of evidence though. *drags Haruka-san to the stage* >:D
And out here, I’ve got our Kurogane – and all the kids as well,
The implications of this phrase are making me sad yet hopeful...
About intermediate scene(s) - how about something very domestic to make it contrast nicely with supernatural talk? A happier moment in their lives, something small to smile about?
Best plot bunnies to you! ^_~
P.S: I friended you, hope you don't mind *^^*
no subject
Date: 2007-09-21 01:23 am (UTC)A good while yet, believe me. Even bringing Haruka into things is really not going to clear things up any.
The implications of this phrase are making me sad yet hopeful...
Really just Fye being Fye. He's just happy where he is.
I don't think the intermediate scene's going to be particularly happy, probably just Watanuki doing some task or other, but we shall see what I can come up with.
P.S: I friended you, hope you don't mind *^^*
Don't mind in the least. ^_^
no subject
Date: 2007-09-21 03:35 am (UTC)And Syaoran. I look forward to expansion on that particular plotline quite a bit. Also Fai's past. :D
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Date: 2007-09-22 03:40 am (UTC)Well, it's not exactly an action oriented story for the most part. Besides, action in this world probably means someone's being shot at. >.>
And Syaoran. I look forward to expansion on that particular plotline quite a bit. Also Fai's past. :D
Gonna have a while to wait on both accounts, I'm afraid. There's a lot more for me to get through first. And, y'know, gotta keep some suspense in it all!
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Date: 2007-09-22 04:19 am (UTC)Very well then. I think I can survive. XD suspense is good! Very good.
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Date: 2007-09-21 09:23 am (UTC)Lovely.
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Date: 2007-09-22 03:53 am (UTC)Of course, Syaoran just wanting to know what Sakura saw...not so much for his own benefit but only because it scares Sakura.
Spot on.
The idea that even if Watanuki wanted to keep what he saw a secret his nature/inabilty to lie very well prevents him from doing that.
Watanuki's going to have to start settling in properly before too long, but he's got a couple more of these kinds of awkward moments before he gets there yet. ^^;
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Date: 2007-09-25 07:39 pm (UTC)Your story has alot of potential. I wouldn't mind if its like a novel long. Theres alot of backstory and not to mention insecurities.
I'd also like to see what would happen if a rival gang tries to steal Watanuki away. Or what would happen if he was forced to give himself up. Oooh the bunnies are multiplying...
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Date: 2007-09-26 01:34 am (UTC)It may be a good thing you'd like this to be novel-length, it's certainly heading that way. As for the rest of your suggestions for things that could happen - well, you'll have to wait and see. ^_~
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Date: 2007-10-12 08:21 pm (UTC)There are some just amazingly brilliant lines here. Fai's response to "what are you doing here?" and Doumeki's "Stare back at him" leap out, but I am green with envy at your skill in writing dialogue in general.
I don't get the impression that Watanuki has yet figured conciously that the nasty spirits keep away when he's near Doumeki -- am I right?
The interplay between Syaoran and Watanuki at the end is great. Watanuki can't lie, and he's not capable of being indifferent enough not to say anyting at all when asked a question. He has the same degree of faith in Watanuki and Watanuki's perceptions as most of Watanuki's previous hosts -- but he's utterly calm and unphased by Watanuki. No wonder he makes Watanuki a little nervous!
But I'm glad Watanuki answered, because I'm sure that Syaoran is capable of imagining far worse things than the truth. *shudders* And the guilt about knowing Sakura's 'secret' is adorable. It makes me want to hug the poor guy.
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Date: 2007-10-13 02:13 am (UTC)There are some just amazingly brilliant lines here. Fai's response to "what are you doing here?" and Doumeki's "Stare back at him" leap out, but I am green with envy at your skill in writing dialogue in general.
Thanks. ^_^ I think I've mentioned before that dialogue's nearly always my favourite part of a story, but most of the holic/tsubasa characters are nice enough to make it easy for me.
I don't get the impression that Watanuki has yet figured conciously that the nasty spirits keep away when he's near Doumeki -- am I right?
You'd be right. I think he's starting to notice that he's seeing a lot less of the unpleasant spirits around the camp, but it'll be a bit longer yet before he really clicks to what's making the difference.
But I'm glad Watanuki answered, because I'm sure that Syaoran is capable of imagining far worse things than the truth. *shudders* And the guilt about knowing Sakura's 'secret' is adorable. It makes me want to hug the poor guy.
The whole scene between Watanuki and Syaoran was one of those ones I didn't see coming until I got to it, Syaoran quite surprised me by bringing up the subject quite that way. I'm not actually sure Syaoran has that much imagination, he's painfully straight forward in this world. But this is something that he knew was hurting Sakura, so of course he couldn't ever just leave it alone. Even if it did mean putting Watanuki in such an awkward position.
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Date: 2007-10-14 02:59 pm (UTC)Hmmm... yeah, I can see Syaoran not being equipped with much of an imagination. I was guessing he'd seen some really horrific things in his life -- but maybe his amnesia covers most of them up?
Was he aware that he was putting Watanuki in an awkward position? He seems to be blind to lots of little social cues... but Watanuki's not subtle about giving them off, either.
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Date: 2007-10-15 12:57 am (UTC)He's seen plenty of horrific things in his life, but he's completely desensitised to them. He understands objectively that they bother other people (particularly Sakura) but doesn't feel anything himself, and that kills most of his imagination on the subject.
I think he might have had some idea he was asking Watanuki awkward questions - at any rate, he knew that going to someone else for information that Sakura wouldn't give him was iffy behaviour, but to him, it was important enough that he found out that he could push those sort of details aside.